Well, obviously nobody has a fix for them, and nobody wants to actually delete them.
I don't think either of these things are true. In my experience, it's not that the flaky tests are not fixable. It is about the lack of time to spend stabilizing these tests. Also, I'm sure we could find some tests that we are willing to delete if, again, we took the time to do so. Nonetheless, neither lack of time nor the desire to see green on testswarm are good enough reasons to have a config flag to skip any tests. The problem remains at the test level. No excuse suffices to make it otherwise.
On a related note, I would also not mind a pony.